Life hack - acceptance is key

 I had written about my security  Gnanasundar sometime ago. he passed away peacefully in December 2021. His son continues to work for us. I miss his presence. he used to take full ownership of the apartment complex.  

Now I have to grapple with lots of loose ends as I take care of the maintenance of the complex. Sundar was my left and right hand. Though I knew his time was short-lived I had not attempted to learn where the motor switch was/how to switch on and off the generator etc. I have to know so I can teach/inform the current security guards. I was getting irritated this morning that the new guard did not know. I paused my behaviour. 

 I was irritated now that Sundar did not pass down the info. I realized I was actually irritated that I had not attempted to 'know'. I had tried to close my mind to his oncoming death. I felt if I did not think of it he would miraculously survive and be with us longer. I had not accepted the situation. I had not prepared myself for the 'death' of a person and thereafter.