learnings

I lovingly gazed at the fresh tomatoes I had bought. Every morning and evening I would hold each one tenderly. I would turn them around. I would check if they were turning soft. This morning as I was checking on my tomatoes I paused. Do I do this to myself? Am I taking care of myself? Am I taking stock of myself - have I gone soft? have I turned harder? I put on a healing piece of music. Sat Still. Closed my eyes. Just three minutes. I thanked the Universe. And I am back....

I was experimenting with the position of my tiny work table. I faced the wall as I wanted to be near the electric point- too bland for me; the mirror- I kept looking at myself more! I then came near the window -it was to my left- I would peek out to get the glimpse of a branch. Till this morning, spiked by coffee I turned the table with me facing the window. Voila. That tiny shift did wonders. I lift my eyes to see the miniscule yet such uplifting greenery; I get more natural light streaming in. I got extra space outside the table to place my coffee cup/water bottle. All these resulted in me opening my blog to post this.  Just wow- that's how I feel. Have you ever felt so with a tiny shift?

One of the issues with video calls- apart from staring at the main speaker I tend to stare at my own video in that corner. I keep checking if I am looking ok. I miss a few points. It is too much stress - so said an acquaintance 🙃. Interesting feedback I thought. It can get stressful because we are not used to to staring one on one. In physical meetings we can look at others ( which is very interesting) and we can even go a bio break. Whilst in home office video calls it is expected to keep focus. My students hence, keep the video and audio off. When I call out their name he/ she will switch on. I don’t take offence as now I understand how tough it must be for them to keep focussing on teachers ( who themselves would be very conscious) through the day. 

It is interesting to note how we tend to live in boxes. Those who longed for family time; those who craved for work from home, those who 'wanted' time to read/cook/try out a hobby/sleep more etc etc. The same people claim they would be happier if these were according to what one wished in smaller doses. The same people who always live at the edge of whichever box they lived in before Corona. If we reflect or observe the people around us, all of us are living it out the same way we lived before Corona. I am talking of the Attitude. That has not changed. The 'worrier', the sorrowful', the pessimist, the realist, the optimist, the joyful, the cynical, the cribber etc all continue to live in the spectrum. The degree would have changed which is natural. We are consistently banging against the sides of the box. If now we can pause; stop the banging and remain in the box savouring the ingredients... I am doing this and enjoying it. What better lesson to be in the here and...

Over the years it had become a habit to drink less water. Since my thirst quotient was low I procrastinated the very act of drinking water. I could survive on a glass of water through a regular day. Of course it began to have its effect on my metabolism. Now I did try several water bottles- plastic , glass, steel, colours and designs to inspire me to drink. To no avail. Till I saw my friend’s college going daughter sipping water constantly from a water bottle which has a straw. Bingo I loved this. I bought a bottle from which I could now sip water. What a remarkable turnaround. I love sipping water than drinking. Just the process of not opening the bottle makes it one step easier. That’s it. A step easier. Ah my life is so much more hydrated now 

In November 2018 my friend suggested that we go on one of our bucket list destinations. Thus was born the dream of visiting Mount Kailash and Lake Manasarovar. About 17 years ago I had resolved to visit these places with my best friend. Hence it was a sentimental dream. It took me three months to decide though due to the cost factor. Once I decided I embarked on a fitness program - a couple of months of gymming, a month of yoga and avoided non veg, milk intake in coffee/tea etc. Decathalon the new sports store 9 or palace should I say!) provided us the necessary gear- shoes, thermals, flask, socks etc. Keep aside approximately ten grand for all this. The stuff is good and worth every paisa. We flew via New Delhi to Kathmandu. Kathmandu was disappointing especially due to old memories from films like Hare Rama, Hare Krishna.  At Kathmandu we visited Pashupathinath temple ( the lingam is beautiful), the jalanarayan temple ( the sleeping idol of Vishnu is gorgeous) and the Swayam...

This piece of art Stared back at me I’m unfinished it says Yet unable to complete I ruminate Many a question runs through No answers an’ too tired am I To seek .... Just as I stoop I spot a blind worm Pushing through the mud. Ramrod straight I stand Chin up girl chin up.. Been there, done that And there’s much more to do Much more to do Much more to do....